


Lingering Thoughts

by Gaming_Wanderer (Silent_Observer_of_time)



Category: Rockman Zero | Mega Man Zero
Genre: Angst and Feels, Dialogue, Fear, Friendship, Gen, Memories, Protective Zero, Remembrance Day, Travel, Worried X
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-07
Updated: 2018-01-07
Packaged: 2019-03-01 17:27:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13299675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Silent_Observer_of_time/pseuds/Gaming_Wanderer
Summary: Two reploids journey through the desert once a week.Even with their remarkable progress, X never enters his destination.Zero doesn't let him, afraid of losing another ally in the battlefield.





	Lingering Thoughts

**Author's Note:**

> Been in my folder for quite some time. Let's post it. :)

**Humans and reploids aren’t usually seen walking about in this hot month. Most of them prefer staying indoors and interact with their fellowmen, often leading to the discussion of the energy crisis.**

 

The first time the legendary Swordsman saw the ghost was when he saved the female who woke him up. Apparently, no one has ever seen a ghost wearing a blue and white robe. The ghost made the blond curious, curiously nostalgic like everything else around him. However, all the reploid wanted to do was say his Thanks for lending him the Z-Saber. The female called Ciel said this was the weapon's name and only the real Zero possesses this. How the Z-saber emerged from a miniature screen was beyond him, but it helped him in killing that golem. This item was also the only thing that made him Zero, aside from his armor color and hair. His voice was a bit rusty, so that didn't count.

 

**Others have no choice but to emerge from the confines of safety and perform their task. Frequently, they lose their lives for the wrong reasons and have grief following in their shadows.**

 

Slicing his enemies in half or hearing the energy blade clash against the air, Zero grew attached to the saber immediately. He wasn't going to give the weapon back, even if he sounds rude. Yet... No matter how hard he tried to find the apparition, Zero couldn't locate the energy signature. Zero asked help from the Resistance members, but no one knew what he was talking about. Slowly, Zero decided to place that ghost at the back of his memories until said elf came back with important info. Everyone was surprised to see the cyber elf (the term Ciel gave it) as the ghost urges them to strike while the Enemy’s base is vulnerable and eliminate that copy. Before Zero could talk to the ghost, the ghost vanished which left Zero to head out to deal with the anarchic leader Copy X. “ **A fake X** ” – Ciel reminded him, but that made no difference did it?

 

**In spite of everything, miracles continue to emerge. The dead cannot fall asleep even if living has become unbearable.**

 

He destroyed everything that went against him, utilizing cyber elves along the way to hear the story of Ciel. Zero felt nothing when the blonde cried and blamed herself. The action was too familiar for him to respond with haste. He watched her first before acting. Zero feels like he’s done this a lot of times, comforting someone who’s always blaming themselves.

 

“ _ **Zero?”**_ **Someone called his name out with slight alarm.**

 

Zero blinks, staring into the desert where the sound came from. Emitting a bluish light, the figure was like a mirage in the desert – a fleeting illusion. The ghost had some similarities with the eternal ruler of Neo Arcadia. The reploid who hunted the Resistance down with an iron fist, Zero wondered if he could have been friends with this fearsome ruler. Alas, he never got a chance to know the blue bomber better. Copy X was too hasty into battling when he heard Ciel’s comment regarding him. Being called a replacement... who wouldn’t get angry? Too bad Zero had no plans on dying. The ghost agreed with the sentiments, protecting Zero when Copy X self-destructed. The ghost apologized for everything as it restored his health and did weapon reparation. Zero didn’t even get to chat when the cyber elf left him to fend off against hundreds of reploids. Killing reploids as a hobby, Zero decided to leave the Resistance. He knew of the consequence of his actions. Zero understood that as soon as he eliminated the ruler, the humans within Neo Arcadia would gain hostility towards the Resistance. Now that their leader was dead, the structures fell down. The three remaining guardians had to take care of the people. The realm was at the verge of anarchy.

 

“ _ **What are you doing?”**_ **The voice softened to an endearing tone.**

 

It’s as if time halted for that specific moment. It was just the two of them yet Zero didn’t have any topic to talk about. The ghost looks at him with worried emerald eyes and shook its head, walking on with shimmering energy behind it. Zero watched his ally glide, not leaving a foot marks in its wake. But what does his entire monologue have to do with moving away from the Resistance? Zero knew the machinery in the enemy base. The swordsman knew that, at any point in time, the enemies could utilize the satellite and disintegrate its target added with a ten kilometer radius explosion. Zero knew they had him tracked. They could kill him at any moment. Worse, they could murder everyone and take Ciel hostage. Everything was possible knowing how emotional his enemies are. Zero wondered why no one was using it. Maybe they were too busy with their own problems. He wasn’t risking it though, Zero simply has to wait for the counter to drop and he'll return to see how everyone is. He wasn't entitled to help them. Zero simply didn't have anywhere else to go.

 

**"Where are you going?" Zero murmured, trudging behind the cyber elf and farther from civilization.**

 

Zero eventually went back to the base, meeting a new reploid leader called Elpizo. The male was filled with vengeance, utterly different from Ciel’s governance. As long as Ciel was all right, Zero will tolerate the fellow and retrieve the cyber elves. Unfortunately, Elpizo is noisy and Zero has to deal with a bigger terrain of individuals who are partnered with Ciel’s Resistance. Fortunately, the ghost siting became more frequent. Seen in random places of the base, the ghost always smiles and tells stories to him about the past. The ghost was so fond of the past, white-washing all of the negativity like a certain fellow called Anderson. Well, Anderson confessed about the end of his happy life so that will do. Yet, Zero hasn’t heard this ghost mention about it. The ghost keeps helping the Resistance and telling Zero about the current state of things in case Zero zoned out from all the unnecessary arguments. Elpizo often argues with Ciel in terms of tactics yet Zero can’t help but agree with one side each time. Ciel always get hurt with his remarks and Elpizo antagonizes him when he points out the truth. The ghost listens and tells him what could happened afterwards. Sitting on the roof and idly chatting with the cyber elf was a nice turn of events. However, the ghost never said its name. All Zero know is that the ghost was a he and they knew each other before. The ghost either has a permanent smile or a melancholic gaze as he offer Zero support, whispering words of improvement as the swordsman fought reploid after reploid. For Zero, this was enough to satiate his curiosity over the cyber elf. This elf who plays with Alouette, hangs out with Cerveau. tucks Ciel to bed and watches Zero’s progress – the blue elf felt like home.

 

 _**"I'm checking on everyone."** _ **His friend commented, walking further. “** _**You?** _ **”**

 

Yes. Home. The elf made things homey like a family. Not like the Resistance weren’t acting like family to him, it’s the environment and atmosphere. The sense of dread and fear lurking in the creaks of the walls, Zero wondered how the elf was able to emulate home. Thus, he wanted to capture his friend. He wanted to see his abilities. Besides, Zero had too much E-Crystals to his disposal. His deceased friend would laugh – a warm innocent voice slight muted by the air. The elf told Zero he was useless and that he was at the end of his limit. He was nothing compared to Jackson. Zero begs to differ, the blue elf simply has low self-esteem issues. Zero feels he’s important and that’s what matter. The blue elf wouldn't respond, pulling out that melancholic face again. Zero hated it. What was there to think about when you're in the middle of a crisis?

 

“ **I’m following you because there’s nothing to do.” Zero mentioned, watching the hem of his friend’s robes. “Why do you keep going there?”**

 

The elf was pitiful. His friend keeps on worrying, similar to Ciel but greater in degree. Zero hated it. His friend’s worry was rubbing on him. Zero wanted to clear those doubts away. He wanted everything to be simple again. The elf made clouds stir under Zero’s head, but the morning rain was what evoked him the most. His friend cries. The cyber elf cries like Ciel, like a human and it was wasteful. Zero knew crying expends energy and cyber elves don’t last forever. Correction, there is the Mother Elf. She’s a huge mass of energy tinkered to cure reploids from the maverick virus. Unfortunately, Dr. Weil corrupted her and the elf’s function became destructive. She’s a Dark Elf most of the time, sealed for hundreds of years inside an empty shell of the true hero. Elpizo wanted to use Mother elf and Ciel was distressed about this. The Mother elf’s two children: Prea and Crea (which was named by Alouette) was taken by the power-seeking reploid to find her. Zero doesn’t like those two elves. They were always annoyed with him.

 

“ **You don’t have any obligations to go there anymore…” Zero followed; a sword in one hand as he directs his attention at the halo above his friend’s head.**

 

Ciel states the Dark elf should always be sealed. The three guardians also agreed, but the two organizations clashed in ideals for a cooperative strategy. That’s when his cyber elf friend, ever so subtle, guides Ciel on what to do. It wasn’t obvious but Zero noticed how his friend’s gaze softens and the usual melancholic gaze intensifies as he moves objects and information to the Resistance base leader. Ciel isn’t dumb. She knew someone was helping her and she accepted it whole-heartedly. All Ciel needed was a little push and everything went the way she wanted it to be. Zero didn’t know why, but those times were dark. The cyber elf was always seen inside Ciel’s lab, watching her work. No one wanted to talk to Zero. They were all thinking of the betrayal and loss. Zero wanted to do something. He needed to fight, to do something to remove this dark mist. Zero had to wait for Ciel and he did just that. It took two days for Ciel to notice him and accommodate him. Add another day and everyone talked about him and Ciel. Nearly a week passed before the cyber elf turns to notice him, emerald meets sapphire. Zero went forward, eyes trained on the invisible figure. The cyber elf watched him come forward to place a blanket over the female and gasped when Zero allowed his hand to touch the apparition. This was something Zero never did before. It was usually the elf who rests on him: head on the shoulder, back to back, head to lap, hand to arm, hand to neck and- The elf stood still as Zero caresses his cheek with one finger, tilting the cyber elf’s upward using the chin. The elf, long recovered, held Zero’s hand with both hands and gives a joke to ease the atmosphere. Unaffected, Zero allows his hand to entwine with the cyber elf's as he led themselves out of the room.

 

“ _ **They are my responsibility. No one else would do it so I have to do this.”**_ **A confident tone for an android that’s long dead.**

 

Zero knew whatever he did changed his relationship with the cyber elf. The elf, who’s default expression was either: joy or worry, gained more expressions. His eyebrows furrowed when he’s annoyed, bites his lower lip when he’s unsure, and gives that small smile when he’s flattered. Zero wonders if that costs energy too, all those extra movements so he offers his friend E-crystals. Zero won’t admit, but he always stares at his cyber elves as they ate. His friend ate like this would be his last – small bites and slow pace. However, his friend was confused when Zero told him about the change. The elf hugs his knees and gives that helpless smile whenever Alouette wanted something from him. _“That’s how I always am. Zero.”_ The elf confessed and warned him on how close Elpizo is to the Dark Elf’s seal. Zero wished he understood what that meant before. How else was the cyber elf able to locate the proximity of those close to the Mother Elf? The cyber elf spelled it six times and he ignored the signs. Zero wished he eliminated Elpizo sooner. Ciel said no one knew any better.

 

“ **You spoil them too much.” Zero comments; walking close enough to hold the cyber elf’s hand. “Let's head back.”**

 

His friend was X. The elf who watched over everyone, including the Guardians, is Rockman X. X, who was his friend, descended down his throne and volunteered to become the vessel to contain Mother elf. X, who Zero failed to save because of his limited capability, watched Elpizo pierce through the synthetic skin for the newly released Mother elf. X, who held him from behind as he destroys every remnant of Elpizo’s body, whispered messages of morality behind his earpiece. X, who stayed by his side while he grieved, brought him news and food whenever possible. X, who had with tears in his eyes, said it was okay that- “ _stop blaming yourself when it’s my fault? Come on Zero. It’s okay. I'm still here. Everything’s going to be okay._ ”

 

“ _ **But Zero…”**_ **The voice quiets down as Zero tugged him back.** _ **“They need me…**_ **”**

“ **No they don’t.” Zero took a step forward and had the elf’s robe touch his dusty armor. “And I know it’s not safe there X.”**

 

Both knew what lays ahead – Neo Arcadia. The greeneries were all in there, everything for Humanity’s survival. X wanted to go there. X confessed on helping everyone all the time, not knowing what else to do but help. Zero knew how that felt and yet he didn’t want X to strain himself. Zero didn’t want X to get hurt, not when every moment could possibly be the last time he might see X. Zero wished his friend would stop risking his life for others, X would never stop because X cares for them. X's paternity might have led the decay of Neo Arcadia yet it could also equate to the unification of the political supporting the implementation, economic reforms that deters the entrance for Violent groups. Resigned, Zero follows the cyber elf who in turn stays in the Home base with Ciel.

 

“ _ **Then do it for me?”**_ **Cyber elf X asked; his smile bloomed while Zero’s frown lengthened.**

“ **I’ll have to meet the Other you.” Zero muttered and something twists inside him as the cyber elf smiles back.**

 

Sometimes, the cyber elf would stand up and walk all the way to Neo Arcadia to help the other side of everyone, everyone who Zero doesn’t know… **like right now**. X has always been like this starting from day one. But now, Zero can’t leave him alone, not when Dr. Weil returned with Omega and another X by his side. Dr. Weil always sends Zero a horrible feeling of dread even if Zero saw the scientist via screen. The other X keeps on stuttering and was nicer compared to Copy X. Omega was a huge piece of armor, golem-like but too bulky and loud. Zero has seen and heard soft golems and if Omega was a golem, he’d be the loudest.

 

“ _ **I know.**_ **” Zero wants to wipe that smile out from his friend’s face. “** _ **He needs a friend.**_ **”**

“ **He’s an enemy.” X shook his head, almost playful. “** _ **Even so, we have to give him a chance.**_ **”**

 

It seems the dead are coming back one by one, creating feats of miracles to wow the crowd. Zero asked X if he could possess the other X, but X asked what would be the purpose of doing such a thing. Both reploids knew the other X was a doll, a puppet Dr. Weil will use. One false move and the other X dies, X didn’t know how to approach his other self not when the other X had identity issues. It seems being called X is a heavy burden for every reploid, but this was the least of Zero’s concerns. Everyone he meets is at the edge of their seats. Harpuia has gone rouge and is now unconscious; Leviathan isn’t sure why she’s even fighting anymore; Fefnir decides to push all problems in the back of his head; and Ciel is working without sleep or food. Moping resistance members bug him for his e-crystals or his assistance. Pantheons start losing their thoughts in favor of something incoherent like Omega. Other X, who they are trying not to kill, wants to find out the whole cold-blooded truth. And Omega, a ruthless machine using his body…

 

“ **Is this about Omega?” X tilts his head, emerald eyes confused with the sudden drop of his friend’s tone. “Are you going to talk to him?”**

“ _ **Are you scared?**_ **” Zero’s grip tightened, “Maybe I am.”**

 

 _'There's something wrong with me.'_   Even without anyone telling him, Zero knows he’s in a fake body and utterly incomparable to Omega. X says it’s the memories that count, but Omega spoke to him as they fought against each other. Omega has his memories. Every nook and cranny utilized to defeat him physically and mentally. Zero was a fake. Omega was the original. Omega, who taunts him for his losses, doesn’t even know the existence of Cyber elf X. Cyber elf X who resides in the base to take care of everything Ciel couldn’t handle (sort of like a guardian angel). Zero didn’t want Omega to find out. Zero doesn’t want to lose X. X was one of his last friends remaining. X doesn’t know of course, too busy: nudging Ciel to the right path - making the system compatible to everything, taking care of Harpuia and Phantom as well as helping the Resistance members up their feet. Zero was afraid, afraid of losing and he was too worried on X’s opinion to even ask. X… X would accept everyone but himself. X loathes himself which makes it his job to straight out bicker with the elf in X’s down moments. X doesn’t even see himself love worthy and whoever agreed with X’s sentiments gets a punch from Zero personally. Zero hates this constant state of paranoia. He wants it to go away, but he’s too anxious on the truth. Does X like Omega or not? Does X like originals or fakes?

 

“ _ **Then don’t be.”**_ **Zero feels a pat on his head,** _ **“You worry too much Z-!”**_

“ **I need you.” X’s eyes widened when his hands are held. “I can’t let you die.”**

 

* * *

A moment of silence

* * *

 

Neither of them understood the other's sentence nor would they want to hear the explanation. A few kilometers from Neo Arcadia, the two entities were left undetected by the pantheons. The Judges might even sense them somewhere along the lines or maybe Dr. Weil himself. In spite of all that, one would follow the other and won’t go without the other.

 

 **"** _ **I'm already dead Z."** _ **X raises his hands to hold the side of the swordsman's face and tilt it downwards. X bumps his helmet gem with Zero's, emerald eyes ironically sparkling with life.**

**"To me you aren't." Zero breathes as he stays still, emotionless and dead. The two stare into each other's eyes, wondering why it was so difficult to understand the other.**

“ _ **I… You can’t keep holding onto me for support Zero.”**_ **X frowned, his halo’s color spectrum tuned to warmer colors as the cyber elf looked away. “** _ **You have so much to live for.**_ **”**

“ **Don’t you think I already know that?” Zero whispered, moving his thumbs inside his friend’s hand. “I… just don’t want to lose you.”**

 

If X went forward, he will need to help the humans inside. If Zero went forward, he will have no choice but to kill his enemies. If Zero allowed X’s way, there will be serious injuries to the part of red swordsman. If X allowed Zero’s way, there will be long nights of worry for the blue gunner. It was a stalemate. Which one would give in? Which one was more selfish?

 

“ _ **And you say I’m a baby.**_ **” X sighs as Zero leaned his head over his comrade.**

“ **You still are” Zero closed his eyes as he smirked, “since I’m your keeper.”**

“ _ **That**_ _ **comment**_ _ **was uncalled for!**_ **” X released Zero’s thumbs and went back to face the city.**

“ **Aww. Did I make baby Blue cry?” Zero teased and the cyber elf crossed his arms.**

 

Zero wants to be the selfish one but he can never say NO to X. X, who was willing to return all of the favors Zero did in the past, looks at him expectantly. Not saying anything, Zero made the cyber elf bow his head in resignation. X must be expecting an apology or add salt from him, how sad. X must have always felt like he was the selfish type but he’s the opposite. If X was so selfish, why did he allow Zero to leave him? Why would X walk for years end to protect humans who wants only ‘more’ to their disposal. If Zero makes a compelling reason, X would believe him without question. If X reveals a disastrous consequence, Zero would obey him without question. This is why they don’t talk about themselves. They talk about other things. X talks about the people and the unknown while Zero talks about the machinery and the obvious. X always has a thing to add in the obvious similar to how Zero points out the truth of the unknown. They felt inseparable.

 

“ _ **Please understand me…**_ **” X whispered, looking up at the skies. “** _ **I really want this to work...**_ **”**

“ **I’m not a star-crossed lover X.” Zero placed his hands on his hips. “I’m the logical one remember?”**

“ _ **Not always.**_ **” X does a pouting face, “** _ **Remember Iris?**_ **”**

“ **I was young and filled with an unfathomable void.” Zero watched X roll his eyes.**

 

It was dissatisfying how their arguments could tear a wall or a bed or even an army of pantheons. When they fight, both of them wanted to get out of the others way in all levels. They knew one would go out first than the other, but separation made the soul yearn. Zero was lonely. X was lonely. The two undeniably met up and apologized at the same time. It was really frustrating how dependent he was to X – the cyber elf he failed to save and will soon vanish from existence. His friend’s death shouldn’t be affecting him so much, seeing as he already mourned for the body. X always veers off that topic, moving to areas Zero loves such as missions.

 

“ _ **I don’t see any changes from this ‘older Zero’.**_ **” X said with a dip of sarcasm** **and suddenly had his right hand held by his friend.**

“ **Why don’t you listen to me anymore?” Zero asked with a sullen tone.**

“ _ **I do but-**_ **” X holds the hand that gripped his so tightly. “** _ **I know there has to be a better way on doing things.**_ **”**

“ **Today isn’t the best day to execute the plan.” Zero mumbled, eyes looking at his friend’s chest. “You can try tomorrow but not now...”**

 

**X stares at him intently, wanting to fight but his face states otherwise.**

“ **Let’s go home X.” Zero bows his head a bit, still holding the hand that he guided long ago. "Please?"**

 

“ _ **Okay."**_

 

**X gives in for the tenth time.**

* * *

 

Floating beside his partner, X can’t bear the thought of Zero grieving over his expected death. He wished there was a better outcome. He really did. X wiped his eyes, hoping his friend doesn’t notice his tears. X doesn’t want Zero thinking he’s scared of the Future. X wants to be remembered as someone who stood for what was right. Someone who the red swordsman can rely on.

Someone... He can look up to like Ciel.  _X wish Ciel can fill Zero’s void._ He really wished, if there was any gods above to hear his request, and if it's possible...  

>   
>  His wishes would come true when he dies.


End file.
